Free Cruise Condoms, Part 2: Squeaky Clean?

Q: Do cruise ships really give free condoms to the crew?

A: Yes. (continued from previous blog) Though I have worked on five cruise lines around the world, I have been on more Carnival ships than any other cruise line. Ship life there, more so than any other cruise line I know, has extreme behavior balanced with extreme precaution. The doctors' office has a separate entrance for the crew and is installed with large bins providing free 24-hour access to band-aids, aspirin, sea-sick pills, and condoms.

Rather than ask why the precautions, the question is what precautions? (see what I had to go through at the end of this blog) Cruise lines prevent disaster by their prerequisite health screens. Armed with knowledge that the worst consequence of promiscuity on board is an unexpected pregnancy, many crew play around even more, it could be argued. But let's be realistic: whenever attractive young people are in the mix together with no supervision, naughty things happen. Cruise lines invest large sums of money on taking care of their crew, and part of that responsibility means keeping their employees happy, healthy, and here. Pregnancies invariably mean signing off, which disappoints all.

Further, what is the likely outcome of an unwanted pregnancy between, say, a Lithuanian and an Indonesian who will both be returning to their separate countries with little or no possibility of seeing each other again? It is by no means certain that a nation will allow even a visitor's visa to a third world nation. Cruise lines take great care of their employees, but it is impractical and inappropriate for them to force any one set of morals on them.

When I signed onto Carnival to work in the restaurants, I took exhaustive medical screenings that made even me (a yoga practicing marathon runner) nervous. My physician literally suspected a practical joke when he saw I was required to take tests generally reserved for men double my age. I had X-rays of my chest, I had EKG's to check my heart, and every drug test known to mankind, from hair to urine to stool samples.

To even set foot on a ship, crew must be squeaky clean. In many nations, sex education is prevented by social mores and/or religious leadership and doctrine. Providing free condoms is the easiest and most logical way to assist experimenting crew who choose not to abstain.